Panic @ The Public Speaking Disco
Deleting IG (sorta), doing things scared, and film
This week we’re diving into various musings…
Deleting IG (kinda)
Doing things scared (aka am I really going to an acting class tonight? internal panic)
Things I’m learning and reading
Comparison Instagram is the thief of joy… or, is it?
I’m experimenting this week.
My main IG has started to feel like LinkedIn: it’s the first thing people ask me for as a way to ‘connect’ and ‘stay in touch’ (aka: quickly assess who you are and your overlap). #LA
My home page is a confusing mix of things that spark comparison, dread, and empty calories of consumption. Bleh. My Reels don’t feel inspiring, more touch points of things in my identity sphere (aka bernese puppies or pokémon). There’s people that would be rude to unfollow, but who I met once and will likely see once a year at a networking event. RIP.
But… my oracle deck account has remained a safe haven for me - I might not post often, but the algorithm and reels is one of my favorite places in social media. It’s a studio of art, creativity, magic, mysticism, tarot, oracle, whales, dragons. It’s all my favorite expressions and art in the world. The reels feel like short films - NOT empty calories. Restorative, not meaningless.
So for this week: rather than go all or nothing, deleting social, et… I simply logged out of all my accounts except for my oracle deck. I’m consuming things I enjoy. There’s no comparison, just warmth + magic.
deep breath out
So far, so good. A peaceful way to be on social.
Doing it Scared
If you’ve been following along - I had my first large leap in the creator space, aka getting hired to host a major company’s YouTube. I then had performance nerves tackle me on the first shoot (full story). It turns out going from filming solo in a living room, to a large commercial set with 2 spotlights and a team of 7, is, in fact, scary. WHO WOULD’VE GUESSED.
So I signed up for improv, public speaking, and acting classes. Tonight’s my first commercial acting class - and they already sent us a ‘slice’ (aka script for a Carvana commercial scene) to practice that we’ll be performing.
Me: panic but wait i’ve never acted before this said for all levels, shouldn’t you give us, idk, THEORY AND LESSONS FIRST?!
I would absolutely love to cut and run, and skip class. But i’ve been particularly inspired by this quote:
“embarassment is an underexplored emotion.”
So… Onwards we go into the unknown
Things I’m Curious About:
Watching: The History of Film an Odyssey (prime)
Listening:
Alex Cooper discusses the business side of her life - contract negotiations, etc.
This playlist (between Love Story and TSITP: I’m in a yearning music state of mind)
Reading: Sponsor Magnet - as someone who had to learn entertainment law from scratch this month, this has every POSSIBLE thing you could ever need to know (for $9 wtf) about being a creator, brand deals, and negotiations. If you’re in the creator space in any way: GET IT. Explained in the most clear, accessible terms.
In the midst of all these new styles of classes, I’ve started to learn about the history of the cinema industry and HOLY. CR** is it fascinating and bleeds into literally EVERYTHING we do today. EVERYTHING.
Who knew Nickelodeon was not a random word invented to sound silly for a network with cartoons, but the name of the first theaters 😂
That Thomas Edison was the inventor of moving pictures - really based on stop motion and realizing a series of photos taken in a burst created a feeling of ‘movement’ to the human eye?
That the idea of editing was… invented.
Theatres had live orchestras and felt more like a theatre performances.
When silent movies got sound, actors were out of work if they had odd accents or voices.
I could go on and on, I don’t remember the last time I was this fascinated by learning history. As someone who grew up a film photographer, working in a darkroom, and moved to digital - it feels like a giant gap in my knowledge to have never known or studied this.
Anyways that’s all this week… Talk soon <3